For those of you who aren't me…and I've noticed a surprisingly large number of people who aren't.
Have you ever seen someone stumble across a sidewalk, trip over a curb, cough several times, then jump up and down, while whimpering and holding their ears? For most folks, the thing to do is ask how that person is. They will undoubtedly answer, “I’m Fine” You and I both know he is not fine. …
Continue reading In Lieu Of The Truth, We Proudly Present This
My great grandmother was very clear on one very important point. Well, she’s not my great grandmother. She’s my grandmother who is great. Just ask her and she’ll tell you for hours just how great she is. She’s a maternity nurse, which to hear her tell it is about two steps tougher than a marine …
Continue reading It’s All About The Beef, ‘Bout The Beef, No Cheddar
When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one person to dissolve the fatherly bonds which have connected them with his daughter, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle him, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that …
Hello to all you good people. Hi to the bad folks as well. I certainly don’t want to discriminate. I leave it to you to determine which you are and will not say a word. How very complete of me. The funny thing about being so comprehensive is that it doesn’t extend to all walks …
Continue reading Sorry If I Upset Your Delicate Sensibilities
I am going to start my post today with an apology. I’m so very sorry. I didn’t know what I was thinking. How I could do something like that is beyond me? I have to blame the basic animal instincts I was born with, and just beg your forgiveness. Again, let me say just how …
My friend Bob once told me that he had the prospicience, that his fulsome bonhomie campanology personalia would be a schwag, or lagniappe, to depute among his janissary of hyperborean hobbledehoys in the sodality. I indited a message saying he should stop this farrago and embrace lagom. As an example, I used an aphyllous tree, …
Have you noticed how amazingly fast Christmas disappears? It’s true. The local radio station, and every store has been playing holiday tunes for months and you were about to go crazy. Then two days later when you finally have your holiday party, and you ask for just one Christmas tune to liven things up they’re …
Continue reading Cause We Need Another Christmas Right This Very Minute
Oh, how I love this joyful time of the year. There are colors everywhere. There are lights on the houses, and hundreds of inflatable giant things all over people’s lawns. Although, I’m not sure what inflatable Minions and Mickey Mice with Santa hats have to do with promoting Christmas cheer. I mean when I walk …
Continue reading Buddy Can You Spare A Ten And Ten More And Ten More…
Excuse me, but how does that great old Christmas song go? Oh yes, I remember it. It’s that time of year when the world falls… for the biggest scam of them all. We’ve done it for years, and you’d think we would learn, but we love the scam. We don’t care that we’re being scammed. …
Well the year from Hell is slowly coming to a close. We have heard all the bad news we can stand, and yet more keeps coming every day. As a concerned citizen it makes me ask a question. Should I heap, even more, bad news upon your beaten brows and get it all out of …
Mr. Ohh!'s Sideways View 