For those of you who aren't me…and I've noticed a surprisingly large number of people who aren't.
I guess that's ok I understand lots of folks love shopping online, and That’s fine. There’s lots of crazy folks in this world. You know ‘You Be You’ and all that crap. However, for me online shopping is akin to showing up at the mouth of a cave with a case of spicy-brown mustard, smacking …
Purchase history When my father was ten-years-old, he went to my grandfather and asked him for ten dollars to buy a game. You might have heard of the type, cardboard playing space with cards and various plastic pieces. So much for the ancient history class. You probably weren’t interested in this fact at all. And …
Early History A thousand years ago, in an obscure unnamed temple in the highest mountains of Tibet, a scrawny monk was meditating. Actually, the guy meditated a lot in his obscure temple. There’s not a lot to do in the highest mountains of Tibet. Especially when you’re a monk who’s taken a vow of silence …
Continue reading Serving Size: The Hidden Evil in Your Food Label
Bringing Truth Esteemed Chicago retailer, Marshal Fields, is credited with this quote, “The customer is always right!” I’ve spent my whole life in one form of customer service or another, and I can truly say Marshal Fields was full of crap! After many years, I think a better quote is, “The customer is an ass, …
An early question Here’s what I wanna know: What crazy idiot got to decide what foods should be called breakfast? In these United States Breakfast is eggs and coffee. Don’t get me wrong I like eggs and coffee, just not every morning. Also yes, I know there are three different types of eggs: Store bought, …
Continue reading The Breakfast Dilemma: Why Are We Stuck with Tradition?
Please hold Hello! Thank you for calling Mr. Ohh!’s Sideways View. If this is an actual emergency, please hang up and dial 911. PAUSE. For Mr. Ohh press 1, for the sideways view press 2. BEEP. Thank you for calling Mr. Ohh!. If this is an actual emergency, please hang up and dial 911. PAUSE. …
Continue reading Modern Technology Is Supposed to Help: So Why Is Everything So Complicated??
Dear friends, I was wondering… No, that’s a bit too formal. How about; Listen up minions I have a command… Nah, this greeting might be offensive to some folks. Let’s try; Howdy folks, I has me a question… Nope, the cowboy thing went out in the nineties. Wow, those writing teachers are correct. The first …
Truth The story you’re about to read is true. The names haven’t been changed because I never knew them in the first place. So how could I have changed them. By sheer luck they may be right. Who knows? But, none of this is important. What’s important is that you’re here for a bit of …
Continue reading Quality Fast Food Stories. Without Speed Or Quality
Cart Wars ep IX The rise of stupid-walker Here’s a question for the ages; If everyone shops for groceries, why am I the only one to notice how stupid it is? I don’t mean that shopping for food in itself is silly. Going to the market is a necessary part of life, like kicking the …
Continue reading The Grocery Store Paradox: A Shopping Experience Gone Bizarre
Do you Care?? I bought a new pair of shoes the other day. But you don’t care. I’m betting none of you out there even give half a fig, that I bought shoes. It’s okay though. My new shoes have absolutely no bearing on your lives. They mean something to me, of course. But frankly, …
Continue reading The Bizarre Quest for the Perfect Shoe Laces
