For those of you who aren't me…and I've noticed a surprisingly large number of people who aren't.
I just read a poll which stated that there are 42% more cats than dogs in the United States of America. I concluded, therefore, that cats are more popular than dogs. Hooray for the cat people. Now, I really don’t follow polls much, and frankly don’t much care if you prefer a cat, dog, turtle, …
What’s in a name? Shakespeare once said, “A rose planted in manure would still stink” Or something like that. Then again, Einstein quipped: “There are only two infinite things, the universe and human stupidity. And I’m not convinced about the first.” Somewhere in between these two great ideals, the human creature has created a friendly …
Continue reading Build A Better Mousetrap And The World Will Call It Irving
My phone and I are no longer on speaking terms. Actually, it’s not my whole phone. I can still send texts and listen to podcasts, but my contacts, schedule, and several apps are locked out because my digital assistant is having a hissy fit. If You Want To Hear Me Read This CLICK HERE If …
A long time ago, when the lawless west was being forged by the pioneers, a solitary territorial farmer stood up and screamed, “This sucks. I should have stayed home.” That man was Rupert J. Snodgrass and he is credited with absolutely nothing. Which is extremely coincidental because he has absolutely nothing to do with this …
Let me get one thing perfectly clear, Little Debbie has served my specialty cake needs for my entire life. Why should I subject myself to the humiliation of those TV bakers who make custards from fifty-year-old cognac? Sure, I don’t get to eat what they craft on the British Baking Show, but when you’re looking …
I’m not sure, but I’m thinking that you might not be able to trust everything you see on the internet. I think some of it might be false. No, I’m not talking about the Russians messing around with elections again, but I think there just might be a foreign power looking to disrupt my happy …
I must say, this winter has lasted longer than some. Although It has not lasted as long as others. In fact, where I live the latest recorded snowfall is June 2nd 1902. In point of fact I’m glad I wasn’t alive that year. It would’ve been way too depressing. On the other hand, there is something …
Somewhere in Egypt, in a yet undiscovered tomb is the hieroglyphic inscription, “Inka dar sorat naag huf” I haven’t the foggiest idea what this means. But I’m sure it’s there. There are all kinds of weird stuff in dark places. My laundry room for example. There is only one bulb to light the entire seventeen …
Continue reading And The Lord Said “Let There Be Light” And Then The Fuse Blew
I have decided I’m going into business. Even now I am wooing venture capitalists, writing business plans, and coming up with innovative ways to avoid paying taxes. (Thanks Mr. President) Don’t panic future investors, I already have my product. I wanted to say this up front in case you think I’m like that woman and …
I have noticed something odd. Some of you are probably saying, “Mr. Ohh!, you notice odd stuff all the time. Why are you telling us about it now?” Ya’ know that is a valid point. I guess this was just odder to me than even the normal odd standard I live with. You see, I …
