A while back I was looking for a new position. No! Not that kind of position! I was looking for a new job. Now, don’t you feel bad, for having such dirty thoughts? Anyway, once you’ve cleansed your mind you’ll probably be thinking, “C’mon Mr. Ohh!. A multi-talented person such as yourself must have people …
This Is The Last Time (or not)
I am about to throw my phone in the garbage. No, that’s too good for it. I am about to buy black-powder and… No not enough. I am about to contact North Korea and ask if I can strap my phone to their next nuclear test package. Oh wait, they don’t do that anymore, our …
Back To Sale (oops I mean School)
You all know the song so sing along School Daze School Daze Dear old Golden Rule days (more like Time to break some rules days) Oops. Sorry, I interrupted the song. Don’t mind me. Keep going. Readin’ and ritein’ and ‘rithmatic Okay, I’ve got to stop this again. How can the most beloved song about …
And Then There’s Mauve
Many years ago, I met Mr. Roy G. Biv. Not to be confused with Roy Bevens, the kid who stole Sara Callahan from me in the sixth grade. That kid was so mean! He knew I liked Sara and he purposely… wait a minute, I’m getting off topic before there even is a topic. So, …
The Quest For The Holy Tote Bag
All right now. Everybody needs to slow down just a little. Someone please tell me what it is with all these tote bags. And no one better tell me that we are saving the planet with these canvas marvels, because the opposite is true. I realize, this is the point where I get in trouble …
North Dakota Blues
“Fifty Nifty United States From thirteen original colonies.” If you have, or ever had, a child attending middle school then you have probably heard this song. They taught it to me when I was in fifth grade and to my kids even earlier. If you’re not remembering, then you might be in denial about your …
Parts Is Parts
I am a highly intelligent, worldly man, who does not succumb to the rhetoric of paranoid conspiracy theorists. I read, and research, every fact to exhaustion, so that I can understand the issue to the fullest. When trouble rears its ugly head, I remain calm, and never get flustered in the least. If you need …
Ever The Name Shall Meet
What’s in a name? Shakespeare wrote, “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” But what if you’re allergic to roses? The names would be very different, much more colorful, and far less flattering, than if you weren’t. Admittedly, he was referring to surnames and not adjectives, but it must be considered. Therefore, …
Drink ‘Em if You Got ‘Em
Well, it’s that time of year again. The NBA finals! (Sound of cheering fans.) Who will it be this year, the Warriors or the Rockets? Perhaps the East will dominate with the Cavaliers or Celtics. Who knows? Either way, we are in for some great competition. (I hope no one sprains a pinky finger. That …
Feed The Birds Or Not
Spring, that glorious time of year when life once again returns out of the havoc that we call winter. I love spring. The only thing I wish about spring is that it lasted longer than a week. I don’t know about you, but where I live, winter runs a little long then suddenly there are …
Mr. Ohh!'s Sideways View 