Here It Comes! Be Prepared To Cry!!

It always starts with an accomplishment... Well, it’s May. A month for rain, flowers, marriages, graduations, and of course tears. This year my second son, leaves high school for the lofty heights of college. My wife sits around looking through the old albums, with a tear in her eye, whilst I cry much louder for …

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Alas, Poor Yorick… ICH!!! I’m Holding A Dead Guy’s Skull!

Misunderstanding Shakespeare “Thou mad mustachio purple-hued maltworms!” Huh?? What the heck is that supposed to mean? This line is a direct quote from William Shakespeare, Henry IV: Part 1, and like so much of old Willy I don’t understand a word of it. I got out my handy-dandy dictionary and I looked up the words. First …

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I Earned It!! I Want That Rose Or Else!

It started so simply 88 Open mouth, insert foot, close mouth. 89 Open mouth, insert foot, close mouth. Oh, I’m sorry, I’m being punished and have to write that one hundred times. Yes, you heard correct. Mr. Ohh! is being disciplined because I did something that not only embarrassed the heck out of one of …

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Don’t Worry, Your Father Knows… NOTHING!!

As the father, it is believed that I know everything. My wife believes it, and my children call me the fountain of eternal knowledge. I love these titles and would do anything to maintain this air of mystique, except for one tiny little problem. It’s all a load of refried-monkey-dung. I don’t know what bunk …

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Protecting The World From Evil Spirits

Several months ago, I got a letter from my old alma mater. Whoopee!! So, they need more cash and think they should ask poor shmucks who haven’t come close to using their degrees in years to give it to them. You’d think intelligent professors in academia, would get the hint; I’m not sending you any …

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Flyers To The Left Of Me, Pamphlets To The Left, Rode The 600

This may surprise many of you, and I hesitate to mention it due to the panic it may cause. Wow isn’t that a great beginning? I’m not sure what I should do. If I keep quiet and don’t tell, then I’ll have to come up with a new topic for this post. On the other …

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